Well. Here we are! It’s been so long since I’ve sat down to write. The last time I sat down to write, just because I felt like it, was when I was still pregnant, I was hot, uncomfortable and more than ready to meet my baby boy. And now he’s here! He’s been here for four weeks, and while I can still remember the birth like it was yesterday (ouch!), it also feels like he has been a part of my life for so much longer.
It’s true what they say about second babies; they just slot in. Some days I honestly barely notice he’s here. Does that sound bad? He’s such a relaxed baby, and an excellent sleeper (thank goodness!) that more often than not he will just be peacefully sleeping in either the Moses Basket or the pram whilst Darcie and I basically carry on as normal.
His needs are simple right now, milk, sleep and cuddles. He feeds a lot! He pretty much cluster fed from birth for the first two weeks. It was tough but ultimately the best time for him to do it because I had Dan at home to help out with Darcie while I sat on the sofa and fed Ernie. Breastfeeding hasn’t been anywhere near as painful this time around and so I’ve quickly learnt to feed on the go. Now when it is just the three of us at home, if Darcie runs off into the garden, I can easily follow her, baby on boob and everyone’s happy. He’s been cluster feeding again more recently and also had a couple of fussy nights but even still, compared to Darcie’s newborn days, it’s been a breeze.
How am I adjusting?
Maybe it’s because he is an ‘easy’ baby or because I’ve done this before, but I can honestly say that I am really enjoying life with two. That’s not to say that it’s not sometimes hard, but I’m just taking each moment as it happens and dealing with the madness the best I can.
I’m realising now that the thing I found most difficult the first time around was actually becoming a mum. But this time, I already am a mum. I haven’t had to go through the same identity crisis that I did last time and, if anything becoming a mum of two has actually increased my confidence. On days when everything goes well, I feel like a total mum boss. And on days when things go wrong, I just remind myself that two children is hard work and not to be too hard on myself.
How is Darcie doing?
Darcie has adjusted to big sister life like an absolute trooper, I’m SO proud of her and quite proud of myself for raising her to be the way that she is (I’m allowed to blow my own trumpet every once in a while right?). The first week or so were definitely a big adjustment and we had some minor changes in behaviour but at four weeks in, I would say she’s fully back to herself. I think the hardest part for her was the changes to her routine. She’s used to most days being just her and I, going off and doing our own thing. But suddenly there were streams of people in her space and I wasn’t at her disposal to the same extent that she has always been used to. But now things are as back to normal as they can be, and our days look very much the same as they used to, we just bring Ernie along everywhere with us too. And she likes that, because she likes her little brother.
She loves cuddling him and is always asking me if she can ‘hold it’. She spends a lot of time very much in his personal space chanting ‘leeetle baby, leeetle baby’ at him and laughing when he ‘tickles’ her by waving his hands around. She helps me with nappy changes and holds his hand in the pram. I can already see that they will have a great bond growing up.
Is she jealous?
Jealousy hasn’t been an issue really. There have been a few times when she has wanted me to pick her up or put her to bed and I’ve been physically unable to, and she’s cried and said ‘mummy?’ in the saddest little voice you can imagine. That has been hard for both of us but it really doesn’t happen too often as I have two arms and always do my best to make sure they can have one each. She’s become very good at understanding when I’m busy with Ernie and her patience is impressive for a two year old. She generally takes it well when I ask her to ‘wait a second’, and I think that’s because I always make sure that I come back to her and that we do whatever it was she was asking for.
Getting Out and About
You might remember that pregnant Hanna was talking a lot about not getting a double pram. I was going to alternate using the pram, the stroller, a wrap/carrier and the buggy board. Well, that all got a bit much and I quickly gave in and bought a double pram. Darcie is still napping in the day and in the hot weather I didn’t want to have to have Ernie in a carrier for Darcie to sleep in the pram. Ultimately it just makes life a lot easier to have one place to put them both when we are out. It means that I can be hands free (well as hands free as you’ll ever be while pushing a pram!) and that they can both be comfortable.
I bought the Red Kite Push Me Twinny which is a side by side pushchair. I liked the idea of them being side by side, it seems more sociable and will be nice as they get older. It is wider obviously than a normal pram but today I managed a trip to town on the bus and it fits on most pavements and through most doors. I’ll do a full review on the pram in due course but so far I am very happy with my choice! I weirdly like that it’s so huge, I feel like I have the Land Rover of prams.
So that’s how we are, at four weeks of Ernie. I’m so, so happy as a mum of two and although there are difficult days and moments that seem impossible, I can honestly say that I’m loving it. I’ve found the jump from one to two an absolute breeze compared to the jump from none to one. I think I had prepared myself for life to become impossible, but I’ve been so pleasantly surprised and I can reassure any soon to be mum’s of two that it really isn’t so bad! Not at the moment anyway, maybe they are just lulling me into a false sense of security…
I’m planning a whole series of posts about lots of the topics I’ve touched upon in this post but if you have anything specific you’d like me to write about, please let me know!